Chennai Talks Taboo: Sex, Sexuality, Periods and Puberty

Chennaiites talk about the need to break taboos in all aspects of life.

Chennaiites break taboos and talk about sex, sexuality, puberty, marriage and choice to not have kids.

(Photo: Altered by The Quint)

Video Editor: Vikram Venkateswaran
Cameraperson: Smitha TK

Don’t talk to your father about periods.

Attracted to the same sex? Oh, that’s just a phase.

On your period? Better not enter the temple.

Sex. Shhh! Don’t speak the word out loud.

There are so many topics and issues that are still not discussed openly in India.

When I came across the poster for ‘Red Light-Breaking Taboos’ — an event focused on making people come out of their comfort zones and talking about issues that have been buried under the label of taboo — I was, no doubt, intrigued.

At this Ted X Napier Bridge organised event in Chennai, I came across people who wanted to express themselves freely, without being tied down by social restrictions or judgement. Many of them came from homes where ‘the talk’ was never a part of casual conversation.

The way you live your life is taboo, right from the time you wake up till you go to bed, from the time you are born till you die.

Vidya, Resident, Chennai

Chennai boasts of a 90 percent literate population but, at the end of the day, it boils down to a conservative maami living in denial of the fact that her child can make their own choices.

My mother tells me to learn cooking everyday. She says the way to make a man like you is through cooking.

Aarthi Anand, Resident, Chennai

When I asked a few young people at the TedX event why there was a clear contrast in views between generations, they said it is because of lack of exposure.

Parents, they said, were not allowed to question social beliefs back in the day, even when the beliefs had no rationale behind them. Now, there seems to be an attempt to pass on the same beliefs onto the next generations.

There is nothing wrong in being conservative but I think it is high time we let people tell us what they want.

Dikshita Jain, Resident, Chennai

Whether it is talking about puberty or sex and sexuality, it has been a big NO-NO in many homes.

I was getting married and I did not know that getting pregnant and getting your periods had something in common.

Vidya, Resident, Chennai

Today’s generation, however, is slowly breaking taboos and trying to explain to their families that sexuality is something that one is born into and not something that one can choose.

People are increasingly speaking openly to their families about being stay-at-home dads, adopting children, choosing to not have children, being atheists, and so on.

Publicly, there is a side to Chennai that everyone sees but privately people are a lot more modern. But people don’t want to stand out in the spotlight.

Ashwin, Resident, Chennai

Here’s a message from our generation to previous generations: we are not seeking approval but only seeking acceptance.