Whenever I go to my son’s school for an event, a neatly laid out table, displaying the best project works from my boy’s batch are on display. Eager kids nudge their parents, who look at their child’s work with great pride, a look that often shames parents like me.
My kids have never had any of their works displayed or showcased.
A glance at the project work, and you know in an instant that the parents have put in more effort than the child.
In our quest to be the best, we want our children to be perfect. So, we end up taking a remedial action without giving them a chance to prove themselves.
Too caught up to read? Listen to the story:
Do you remember the playground from your childhood where you spent long evenings on the swing being reckless? Yes there were times you got hurt, but did your parents stop you from going out the next day?
So, what can we do to stop being that over-protective helicopter parent and let the children know that it’s okay to falter?
Here are 5 ways to let your children learn, without being over-bearing and over-protective.
So my boys are at a phase where their teachers are always right.
If I tell them what they’ve written in the homework sheet isn’t correct, pat comes the reply, “but my teacher said that this was the right way to do it.” I usually let the mistake go and a cross from the red pen makes them realise they are wrong.
Children can take up chores/responsibilities that are age-appropriate. Has it ever happened to you that your child comes back home miffed because YOU did not remind him to complete an assignment? It’s happened in our house and we turned it into a learning moment.
Failure is not something that one should be ashamed of, everyone learns from their failures.
As parents, we really are the best teachers and influencers, so be that good example.
Sometimes I do turn into that nagging mom who is breathing down their neck telling them what to do, what to wear, what to eat, when to sleep…get the drift?
While it is ALRIGHT to do this once in a while, nagging can’t be the norm.
What you need to do instead is to lay down basic ground rules and let your children make their own decisions. And face the consequences that come out of them.
“I know what you are thinking,” whenever my mother said this to me, it would leave me baffled. Was she a clairvoyant?
When you tell your child this, you are controlling his thoughts and actions, giving him no leeway to express himself.
As a parent, you need to let them decide what they want to share with you and how they want to express it. You’ll be raising children who won’t suppress their feelings.
As parents, it is but natural that we shield and protect them instinctively. While we do owe them love and protection, we also owe them a sense of learning – something that will help them take the right decisions in life.
They need to know and learn from their share of disappointments, fears, pains and frustrations. It’s these lessons that will instill self-knowledge and make them grow stronger.
(Pratibha spent her childhood in idyllic places only fauji kids would have heard of. When she's not rooting for eco-living or whipping up some DIY recipes to share with her readers, Pratibha is creating magic with social media. You can view her blog at www.pratsmusings.com or reach to her on Twitter at @myepica.)
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