Dear Ma,
You might wonder as you read along why I decided to write you this letter. Priyanka Chopra is partly to blame...or thank, as I see it. After winning the Padma Shri honour recently, she said something that stayed with me, “Shri is better than Shrimati”. And just like that, so very easily, she made ‘being single’ sound not so damn bad.
Even though I finally ‘got lucky’ at 30, it’s hard to forget the years that led up to it.
Don’t roll your eyes just yet ma. I know that log kya kahenge bothered you. I also know that I’m no Priyanka Chopra. But my looks and accomplishments, for whatever they’re worth, mean the world to me...and that’s enough quite frankly.
Though you’d never discouraged me from having a mind of my own or from striving for the best in my professional and personal life, somehow the pressure of finding a suitable match, had managed to become your greatest, unspoken agenda. One that was bigger than my superhero dreams and aspirations.
I wonder if Priyanka Chopra gets an earful from her mother about not being married at 33. I find myself surrounded by women, who are somewhere in the dreaded 25-35 age bracket, whose parents can’t stop stressing about their beti ki shaadi. But all this worrying is nothing but a sad waste.
I don’t mean to sound like an ungrateful brat ma, but it does irk me now that you didn’t help me find my dream job with equal gusto. And that you let me make my own decisions, about going to university and choosing the friends that I have. Why did I grow up hearing ‘just follow your heart’? And when you trusted me with so much, why did you lose faith in my ability to find myself the right partner in crime?
I don’t deny for a second that having a companion for life is no less of a priority. But let me assure you, you taught me how to love and you taught me well. I wouldn’t have let it go to waste in a silly hurry.
You’re right, maybe I’ll understand your ‘worrying’ only when I have a daughter of my own. And I’ll want the best for her, just like you want for me. I too will try to protect her from her own ideas. But I will let her love in her own time.
Believe it or not ma, there’s no clock, and neither is there a time bomb ticking away. Both Priyanka Chopra and I will make it through life, love and heartache. I just feel sorry for yours.
I want to get married but no one can claim me until someone really claims me. When a guy comes into my life, it will not be for diamonds. A guy will be in my life only when I am in love. I don’t need a guy for anything else except for children.Priyanka Chopra, Actress
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