Talent: Kavyasri Srinath
Producers: Vatsala Singh and Namita Handa Jolly
Camerapersons: Abhey Sharma & Athar Rather
Editor: Kunal Mehra
(This article was first published on 20 September 2017. It is being reposted from The Quint’s archives to mark the beginning of Navratri.)
Today we have a very “pure and pious” product, which is only in the market for nine days. That’s right, just nine days. Not because it’s in high demand, but because we don’t think millennials can handle this product for more than nine days.
It’s time to unbox Navratri!
Suraksha Kawach: This is for all you lovely ladies who just want to have a good time. Nothing can wreck your garba nights anymore. Sexual harassment, lecherous men, creepy uncles and pados wali matrimonial aunties — you know what to do.
Headphones: These will come in handy so you can drown out all your Bengali friends who’ve got meaty tales to share about Durga Pujo. While you're forced to turn into a herbivore, they're busy gorging on chicken! Arrgghh!
A Falguni Pathak doll: You don’t get to see this much the rest of the year. And brace yourself, the Falguni Pathak memes are coming! Keep this safe, you'll need this again next year.
Antacid: You need this one the most. No, its not just for all the food. This will help you burp out all that unnecessary criticism that comes your way.
Lemon: When can you do if life gives you a lemon during Navratri? Sorry, tequila shots, we’re going to have to make do with some nimbu pani. Sigh.
Peanuts: Because that’s all you’ll be left with in your pockets after these nine days.
Shubh Navratri!
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