Love in the Time of Curfew: Kashmiris Forced to Call Off Weddings

Wedding preparations for this Kashmiri family were in full swing until the effective abrogation of Article 370.

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Dance, music, and celebrations were in full swing for a wedding in this Kashmiri family until the effective abrogation of Article 370 and 35A, bifurcating the state of Jammu and Kashmir into two Union Territories – Jammu-Kashmir and Ladakh.

Speaking to The Quint, the bridegroom’s father, Dr Nissar Ahmad Mir said the sudden decision on Kashmir has forced families to postpone or even cancel weddings.

“My son's marriage was scheduled on 16-18 August. We were supposed to host the reception on 18 August, while 16 and 17 August was mehndi and vidaai. But because of the current situation we had to cancel everything. What could we have done? We had invited 800-900 people but nobody will be able to come. Everyone is unhappy,” Dr Mir said.

In the wake of the effective abrogation of Article 370, couples in Jammu and Kashmir had no option but to cancel weddings as a curfew and communication blackout brought life to a standstill.

‘Nothing is Like What We Dreamed Of’

The groom, Atif Nissar Mir, said celebrations were called off. “Nothing is like what we had dreamed of. We have our own culture and customs which continue for 7 days.”

“Everything was planned but because of what happened these events cannot take place. It’s just the date that we know, that 16 August is when we are going to get we know nothing about each other.”
Atif Nissar Mir, Groom

Lakhs Spent in Vain

Walking across the rooms that now house incomplete blocks of furniture, the groom’s sister, Ghausia Nissar, said the workers and the labourers left in light of the grim situation.

The groom’s mother also lamented on the turn of events, saying even the cooks left without any notice.

“We have paid half of the advance to everyone. Everything is over now. We have just one son, I have many dreams for him. Look at this (drums), what will we do with it now? Guests who come play this, but now nobody can come.”
Groom’s mother

‘Communication Shutdown Made Life More Difficult’

The Nissar family have no clue on how to go about the wedding with no scope for communication.

The groom’s mother said, “When there is phone (network), we can at least talk. We don't know where our (to be) daughter-in-law is or where her family is and what they have prepared or how will we go for nikah (marriage)...”

“We can only go if they give us written permission for 3-4 of us to go. Otherwise we can't go,” said Atif, the groom, adding that prior permission needs to be sought from CRPF.

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