QRant: Hey Mr Khattar, Just Stay Away From My Biryani!

Dear Mr Manohar Lal Khattar and Anil Vij, don’t you dare come after our biryani. Pyaar dekha hai Sir, gussa nahi!

Published10 Sep 2016, 03:01 AM IST
2 min read

Give me a break, people. All I want to do is eat my biryani in peace, but no, our very own biriyani police had to spoil it… Yes, we have Biryani Police now! Haryana Police has taken biryani samples for beef-testing. Kitne samples test karoge? There are millions of Muslims, Christians, Dalits… even upper caste Hindus who have been eating beef for years. MILLIONS! HOW… how can Mr Khattar and Mr Vij possibly police them all? There’s no ban on eating beef. It’s just cattle slaughter that’s banned and regulated across some states.

What if it’s imported beef that you find in the biryani… how will you know its imported? Or will you say that even cows from Argentina are sacred? What about the fillet mignon served in a fancy Delhi restaurant? What if I got the beef from a cow that had just died a ‘natural death’? How would you know if that’s the truth or not?

Aur police kitni hai aapke paas? Eid ke din kya curfew laagu karoge? 144 daaloge? Taaki log apni biryani mein beef na daalein? Price of mutton, chicken... pata hai? Rs 300-400 per kilo! Beef… much, much less than that! Toh gareeb khaata hai beefsadiyon se khaata aa raha hai… protein bhaari maatra mein milti ha iss se. To kyo na khaaye, kyon na khilaaye apne bhookhe bachchon ko?

Itni si baat samajh mein kyon nahi aati Mr Vij!? Some people can be Non-Vij sirji!! Dacoity, rape on highways, honour killings, female foeticide – yeh sab to roka nahi ja raha aapse, lekin beef ke peeche aap zaroor padenge! Lovely! Dil jeet liya aapne meraAgli baar mere se vote maangne mat aana… go to the cows… am sure you will have their vote!

And don’t you dare come after my biryani. Pyaar dekha hai, gussa nahi!

Script: Rohit Khanna
Camera: Sanjoy Deb
Video Editor: Purnendu Pritam

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