I’m Not a Born Actor, I Work Myself Up to That Level: Aamir Khan

“My first reading during a rehearsal is pathetic, that’s when I feel the director will ask me to leave,” he says.

Aamir Khan was only 23 years old when he made his Bollywood debut with Qayamat se Qayamat Tak (1988). It has been 30 years since and with time, he has evolved just not as an actor but also as a producer. The Quint caught up with Aamir Khan at his Bandra office to talk about all the things that have made him Mr Perfectionist and a superstar.

“It feels like yesterday, it doesn't feel like thirty years have passed. I think time has that quality - when it passes and it passes with a flash.” says Aamir as he sips his coffee. His stardom has hardly gone unnoticed, but he says his only competition has been himself. He says, “ I have been very demanding of myself. So the work I do must stand up to my own standards. That is what I am most concerned about.”

Am I happy with the work I am doing? That has been my primary driving force in terms of quality check on my work.

Aamir Khan, Actor

In last 10 years, Aamir has played characters from a 22-year-old to a 57-year-old. From Rancho (3 Idiots) to Mahaveer Singh Phogat (Dangal), we remember every character distinctively. But he says it’s only his quality of work and the consistency of it that has got him where he is today.

“It takes time to make a goodwill in the industry. When you are consistent over time, only then you are able to  build certain faith in people’s mind. I can not claim that I tried to do that but I did try to satisfy myself as a creative person,” he says.

We have all seen the little Aamir in Yaadon Ki Baaraat but it was with Qayamat Se Qayamat Tak that he made an official entry into the film industry. Aamir recalls his first day of shoot:

“I remember the first day of my film Qayamat Se Qayamat Tak. It was a big disaster. We were shooting in Ooty in a jungle. The weather was a little foggy and we  took some takes too, but in few minutes there was a lot of fog around that we couldn’t even see anything. The fog stayed for the whole day and we had to pack up.”

But despite being a producer and director’s son, Aamir Khan was very grounded. He used public transport and star kids then were never in the limelight. Aamir’s first salary was Rs 1,000 per month and it was for Qayamat Se Qayamat Tak, which went on for one-and-a-half-years. So when the film became a superhit, young Aamir was not ready for the fame.

“After QSQT,  people would just come everywhere to see me; I couldn’t walk on the road. I did a successful film, but I didn’t have a car. I used to travel by autorickshaw or bus but after a point, I couldn’t. So I used to tell my uncle, can I borrow your car, I have to go somewhere. There are just people everywhere I go.”

While his name is taken among the best actors in Indian cinema, Aamir has a surprising take on it. According to him, he is not a born actor.

“When I see actors like Naseeruddin Shah, Om Puri, Raghuveer Yadav, Dilip Kumar, Amitabh Bachchan, Zaira Waseem, I feel that they are powerhouses. When they give their shot, there is so much belief in them and it comes out very naturally and effortlessly. I don’t feel that I have that gift. I feel I have to work myself up to that level, it will take a bit to reach that level.”

The actor goes on to explain how he prepares for a role and how much time it takes for him to get into his character compared to a Zaira Wasim.

“My first reading is pathetic, that's when I feel the director will ask me to leave,” he laughs.

“My biggest strength is I am not scared to fail. So I’m not shy or scared during rehearsals. I can sense a good performance and I can work my way there.”

And then to my surprise, he compares himself to actress Zaira Wasim. He admits that Zaira he is a born actor and he is not. He says, “For someone like Zaira Wasim, it just happens, she picks up faster. I have to understand a role, work on it and reach that point. Say for example, in a performance if I show that I am hurt, then that's a superficial level of performance because I am hurt and I'm showing hurt. Slightly deeper is I'm hurt and I'm not showing it but you are understanding it by just seeing my behaviour. When you layer a performance, it gets richer.”

And then Mr perfectionist insists he is not that perfect - at memorising dialogues for one - and he has no qualms in accepting that.

Some people have a photographic memory. Sanjay Dutt can just see one page, and he will know all the lines. You give him three pages, and he will look at them and keep the paper and will be ready. I am not like that. I take time. I do rehearsals for three to four months before a film.

Aamir first does rehearsals with his director then does rehearsals alone, so that when he is on the set, he should be ready. It become his dialogues not the writer’s line. Now that’s called perfection.