Sometimes I wonder if all gay people are defined by their sexuality… if not defined, then maybe identified primarily by it? Why does that happen? Is that a bad thing? I’m out and proud and a shameless rainbow of a man (see what I did there?), but I often wonder if we are destined to carry the burden of “Gaydom” wherever we go?
Take the case of two high profile gay celebrities who came to India this week, tech czar Tim Cook of Apple and the man awesome enough to be both Gandalf and Magneto, Sir Ian McKellen. While Cook managed to generate reams of newsprint during his brief but significant visit, he was also panned for not standing up against a government that is still dillydallying on the issue of section 377.
He was criticised for meeting the Prime Minister who
belongs to a ruling party that is a den of out and proud homophobes. The LGBT
community wondered how could an openly gay and powerful man like him bow down
to business pressures and not raise his voice against labeling of any sex other
than peno-vaginal as “unnatural” under Indian law and criminalisation of such
“unnatural” sexual activities.
To this I say, guys, take a chill pill. The man was here on business. I believe in the separation of Church and State. Tim Cook was here in an official capacity. He was here as the CEO of Apple. He was here to do business with a country that is one of its largest growing markets. So please, give him a break. Cut him some slack.
I had a horrible argument with a BJP supporting homo-dost who raised a finger against Tim Cook saying, “he should threaten to get Apple to stop all businesses with india if the government doesn’t take a stand against section 377”. I just replied saying, “if you were so concerned about homophobia and section 377, you shouldn’t have got a party with a proven alliance with homophobes of the worst order to manage the business of India”.
He then retorted with “development” and I just said “exactly”
with my cocky sarcastic smile.
Meanwhile in my part of the bay, Sir Ian McKellen played to the galleries and said exactly what was expected of him. He articulated his distaste with our government’s colonial hangover. He expressed his disgust at the rampant homophobia and discrimination of LGBT people in India… and he did it all with aplomb! Now ordinarily when our athithis bitch about India, we don’t hold back before holding a mirror to them. But this time, when a foreigner unexpectedly met all our expectations in condemning all that is wrong with our country, we got confused and ended up targeting my friend, poor Aamir Khan.
Yes, maybe Aamir should have done his homework about Sir Ian’s movies. It’s been 4 years since I met him at the shoot of Satyamev Jayate, and I was witness to his sharp mind and research on every intricate detail on that show. It is shocking to see that he faltered. I can’t imagine someone blundering on a Sridevi film when interviewing her. So I can understand the anger that Sir Ian’s fans and the fans of the cult classics that he was a part of.
Andre, my friend from Buzzfeed
is for sure an obsessive fan. I wasn’t at the venue, so I cant say what
happened there. But homosexuality is not illegal in India. And yes, there is no
actor who is openly homosexual in Bollywood. There are directors and
screenwriters, but not actors.
Let me clarify, it is NOT illegal to be gay in India. Any sexual activity that is “against the order of nature” is illegal. So even if a lawfully wedded couple engages in anal or oral sex, it is illegal! Hell, it is illegal to even masturbate… I kid you not! Why, because your hand is not a natural orifice and it is illegal for your penis to enter an unnatural orifice. It’s idiotic, I know!
Since I am protective of Aamir and can’t deny that I am biased too, I would just like to get my bitchy side out and say “ Hello! I’m not sure if Sir Ian can name even one of Aamir’s movies (and he has acted in some excellent ones, pardon him for Tum Mere Ho and Talaash).”
So, in conclusion. It is cool to be gay, as cool as cool can be. In fact it’s awesome to be comfortable with your skin and under your skin. Be sexual… homosexual, heterosexual, bisexual… try-sexual. It is also cool to be asexual. Some people are just not into sex and that is perfectly natural.
Just as it is perfectly natural to mind one’s own business and not be an activist 24x7. It is OK to visit a country and criticise its laws. Rights for living beings is a universal thing. Love for people, animals and nature is a universal emotion. It is OK to comment and OK to not comment. It is OK to keep your mouth shut and be a smart businessman.
You don’t have to wave a flag or be an activist to earn your gay stripes. I
would rather lobby with Tim Cook and get him to give discounted bundled iPhone
offers to life-partners who are willing to pose with their newly purchased
iPhone with the jhoota Apple
and share it publicly on Facebook stating “I am Adam, this is Steve, my
partner, he ate this apple.”
(Harish Iyer is an equal rights activist working for the rights of the LGBT community, women, children and animals. ‘Rainbow Man’ is Harish’s regular blog for The Quint)
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