So Darling Husband and I put our summer holidays to good use and now, all being well, we’ll have a baby in May. Very efficient, I think you’ll agree. My body is coping superbly – no morning sickness, just a touch of nausea and best of all, I’m finding fried and non-veg food utterly naff. It’s fun pretending to be responsible, making out like this is a conscious choice, when it’s certainly not.
I was fool enough to put the news of my pregnancy on Facebook, never mind the buri nazar and the fact that my parents were robbed of the joy of breaking this news selectively - all my parents’ friends found out through their children and the novelty was gone. Cue the welcome congratulatory messages pouring in from friends with a few cheeky well-dones thrown in for good measure. But five months in, I’m still fielding and withering at the bright-eyed, high pitched remarks like “Excited??? Scared? Nervous?!!!”.
What I certainly didn’t expect, but perhaps should have, was some of my close girlfriends, mummies themselves, crowing about how I should “say bye to staying thin, darling” and welcoming me to the “fat side” of womanhood. WTmightyF was one of the milder reactions I had. What blasted sisterhood was this?
I am a woman, I have body issues. I am also selfish enough that my body changing irreversibly featured strongly in the con section of pros and cons of having children, in addition to the drain of time, money, sleep… in whatever order. I was one of those swearing off children. But like a curious cat with a death wish, I thought why not. It can’t be that hard. So my life will change? Good, bring it on. And my body will change too? Gulp!
I am literally smothering myself in emollients and oils to keep stretch marks at bay. Another trick that I’m hoping will work is switching the water temperature to icy cold for the last 30 seconds of the shower. Apparently it boosts micro-circulation to the skin surface and makes it more, let’s say, pliant and prepared so it doesn’t get taken by surprise when the real stretching happens*.
When it comes to the endless “but you’re eating for two” comments from friends, inevitably women, encouraging me to not hold back, I have to catch myself snapping their heads off with “at 20 weeks, it’s only the size of a small fish – it definitely does not need another helping of mango and passion fruit cheesecake, thanks”.
Each pregnancy may be different, but keeping a tenant gratis in your body for 9 months has its perks. You get seriously delicious curves and if you’re lucky, your skin starts gleaming and seems to auto-cleanse itself. So why not toe the if you’ve got it, flaunt it line and show it off, little mama? A quick web search will throw up endless suggestions on pregnancy fashion, but a good beginning is that you need to embrace where you are in life and marvel at the immense task your body’s undertaken, of growing a freakin’ human being inside it. It may be simple biology, but because my forever under-appreciated body’s doing the job now, I am still gobsmacked at the phenomenon.
Truth is, if you feel lush, you’ll look it and a bit of thought goes a long way. Pay more attention to grooming; consider the silhouette and the drape of a garment. Invest in clothes that will let you grow freely without it feeling like you’re wearing a tent. Ban the caftans and instead, accentuate with bodycon tops, dresses, fitted jackets (that don’t need to close over your bump) and thank heavens for belts. Pair some good maternity leggings with slightly oversized shirts. Or reverse it and go for a fitting top and a flowing maxi skirt or relaxed joggers.
Growing a baby inside you is like making magic happen, albeit over 9 months; like a pataka with a long fuse if you may. While the result will change you life, the journey is just as important. So may as well fun. Say what?
*Will update on the result of this experiment after the baby’s popped!
( The author is a former Television Journo, Simrat Ghuman – currently Head of Communications and Marketing at Anthemis Group in London – made a discovery this summer. She was making a baby. This is the beginning of her series of Dealing-With-Being-Preggers blog.)
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