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Dear 18-Year-Old Me, Don’t Let The Fear Of Unknown Hold You Back

Ananya Writes To Her Younger Self How She Found Love In The Most Unusual Place

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Women
3 min read
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Hindi Female

Dear 18 year old Ananya,

I know you think life isn't as great. You were just about getting the hang of college life when your first boyfriend dumped you. You were in a serious relationship, or so you thought, and you were completely smitten by him.

I know, girl, you are lying face down in your pillow, second-guessing your decision to put down the 5th unsolicited dating proposal you received this year. So many of your friends are dating, and while you love your single life, you find yourself often feeling alone or left out during group hangouts.

But, don't be so harsh on yourself - you took the right decision. You shouldn't settle for someone you don't even like just for the sake of getting into the 'dating wagon.' I know it's easy to start worrying that your friends might stop hanging out with you, or that you may never be able to find a guy of your choice, that you will have to settle with men who go hot and cold, while every other friend around you is finding their 'happy ending.' I know it hurts a little bit to go for your favorite movie alone or not have anyone with whom to discuss a random topic to death because your friends are suddenly ‘too busy’ for you and new ones are almost impossible to find.

Let me tell you a secret. Remember how mom always said, don’t talk to strangers on the internet. Well, you will go ahead and create an anonymous blog and orkut profile anyway. It will be your only comfort at a time when your MS preparations will be driving you crazy. You would take breaks from studies and chat with your friends online about the most varied list of topics. And one day there you would find this great guy you would date for two happy years.

It will be after him that you will lose your inhibitions of finding good people online. I know 2000s are the time when everybody is scared of technology, mostly because it is so new and unknown, but you will realise in a few years that fear is overrated.

Ananya Writes
To Her Younger Self How She Found Love In The Most Unusual Place
Don’t fear technology, it’ll only empower you. (Photo: The Quint)

You will "meet up" exciting people on Gchat, invite the romantic interest you met on Facebook to hang out with your chums. You might be scandalised to know this, but trust me, just a late-night WhatsApp chat or tweet for an impromptu date will actually give you an adrenaline rush - something that you are skeptical of right now.

Oh, let me tell you another secret. At 26, when you will give up on your dreams of finding the right man, you will find your colleague swiping through her phone and smiling to herself. When you would ask her what is up, she would introduce you to this really cool dating app called Tinder that will let you make meaningful connections, connect you with like-minded people, and help you have engaging conversations, make new friends outside your comfort zone. Honestly, while I write this letter to you, an amazing man I met on that app is sitting across me, watching our favourite show on Netflix. He is the kind of person that makes me wonder every now and then how is it that the Universe kept me away from him for the first 26 years of my life, and also the kind of man I wonder if I’d have ever met had it not been for a fortuitous right swipe. Pure bliss!

He has made me a better person and made me see the world in a different light. He has made me change my whole perception about finding people at the most unconventional places. I know you right now are too shy or too conservative and the idea a fairytale romance, not in a novel, but on a phone app sounds bewildering, but I as a grown up you, am vouching for it. Just take that leap of faith.

P.S. I love you for taking that first step and creating that first social media profile when it was still the Wild West. The liberation started from there.

(At The Quint, we are answerable only to our audience. Play an active role in shaping our journalism by becoming a member. Because the truth is worth it.)

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Topics:  Tinder   Online Dating   Happy Women's Day 

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