Confession: I actually just wanted to know what kind of father Imran Khan is, what his children are like, what role he plays in his two son’s lives. Instead, he went off on a tangent about Western feminism and how it is antithetical to motherhood.
As part of a wide-ranging interview that focused on Imran, the person, rather than the politician, we showed him a rare clip of him celebrating a birthday with his sons. He looked wistful, a little sad; those were the days after all when he was still married to his first wife Jemima, and his sons Qasim and Sulaiman were toddlers.
“What are your sons like now? How have they grown up as people?” I asked.
“They have influences on both sides. One of them is more like his mother. Mothers have the most influence on their children’s lives. When you say mother tongue, because that is their primary language, their training is the mother’s job, especially if she is a good mother. I disagree with the Western concept, the feminism movement, it has degraded the role of the mother.”
Feminists Are Bad Mothers? Try Again
Imran Khan seemed to imply that feminists are bad mothers, under the influence of the West where mothers are not valued any longer, that women wanting to be recognised as a whole rather than the sum of their biology is wrong, that fathers have little or no role to play in their children’s upbringing beyond their genetic contribution, and that this is acceptable.
Confession: I was just as shocked as many others have been as he said those words, my reaction shot is not in the final edited interview, because frankly, the interview was not about me or my opinions.
But I do believe what Imran Khan said – leader of one of the largest and influential political parties in Pakistan, so confident of becoming prime minister – is worth unpacking.
It is a disservice to his own former wife, who has not only raised his sons but is a film and documentary producer and political activist in her own right, the women in his political party, and his female voters – but it also demonstrates a poor understanding of how feminism has shaped global debate and laws on the rights of mothers.
Degrading Fatherhood in the Bargain
First, Mother’s Day as a public holiday – now celebrated worldwide, including Pakistan – originated in the US because of a campaign led by a church-going community organiser called Ann Jarvis, and later as a vehicle by then first lady Eleanor Roosevelt to promote the health and welfare of women and children. Second, it is because of ‘western feminism’ that working mothers have been able to claim paid maternal leave, or ask for flexible working hours, or certain companies have introduced ‘back-to-work’ initiatives for women who choose to take a career break to raise their children. These symbolic commemorative days, laws and policies hardly degrade mothers, they provide choices to mothers who want or need to work.
So much for symbolic commemorative days, laws and policies on mothers. Where there is disagreement is on the patriarchal notion of motherhood – surely it is not for men like Imran Khan to decide how women choose to find meaning and add value to their lives – over the experience of mothering. Here, more radical strains of feminism do consider motherhood a form of reproductive oppression.
But then if Imran Khan can admire the Taliban style of justice and object to being called Taliban Khan, surely feminism as an ideology can be forgiven its ‘extremists’ too.
Feminism is about women having choice and agency over their own lives and bodies, about recognising that a women’s unpaid labour at home has tremendous economic value too, about understanding where gender roles are socially constructed to keep them confined to the home and kitchen. A woman is more than a mother, sister, wife and daughter, her relationships do not define her. Most importantly, a woman has a right to an intellectual and public life too.
Confession: I have two daughters and have worked throughout my pregnancies and as they were growing up. I was able to do this because my spouse is an incredibly involved father – from changing diapers, to making their hair before school, to putting them to bed, to helping them with their homework, to playing with them, to preparing meals and snacks for them. We have shared the burden of childcare because parenting is a shared responsibility. While the PTI chairman may see ‘Western feminism’ as degrading to motherhood, his opinion actually degrades fatherhood.
A Weak Grasp of Feminism
Over the course of Eid holidays, when the news cycle slows, it has been heartening to see the debate the interview generated. Bilawal Bhutto Zardari – his mother after all was Pakistan’s most powerful woman even as she bore and raised her three children – tweeted:
Meanwhile, the country’s leading newspaper Dawn editorialised:
The statement is both asinine and offensive. It betrays a total lack of understanding about feminism, a concept that underlies many rights for women taken for granted today (or on which the ongoing struggle for women’s rights is based). For example, the acceptance of women’s franchise, an important consideration for a party that likes to claim a huge female support base. Moreover, Mr Khan’s statement pedals hackneyed typecasting of women solely in terms of motherhood.
Sadly, the cold hard reality is that the debate is unlikely to either move or change the opinion of Mr Khan and his many followers – including women – who buy into this over-simplified and ill-informed understanding of feminism.
(Amber Shamsi is a multimedia journalist who has worked for international and national media organisations as a reporter and on the editorial desk. She can be reached @AmberRShamsi. This is an opinion piece and the views expressed above are the author’s own. The Quint neither endorses nor is responsible for the same.)
(At The Quint, we are answerable only to our audience. Play an active role in shaping our journalism by becoming a member. Because the truth is worth it.)