So, here’s where you’re at...
You’ve just bagged your honours/masters degree (with a distinction that too!) and are all prepped for the city living and loving. You can just smell the fancy coffee and the opportunity. But fast forward five months, and let’s just say it’s not all that. In fact, you’re downright unimpressed.
Firstly, your social life.
What the everloving hell? When did you grow so apart from your childhood bestie? And why are you unable to party Wednesday through Sunday when you’ve done it all your freaking life before? And the hangovers. Let’s just say when you’re expected to present your report at 9 the next morning, that last gimlet doesn’t seem like the best idea you ever had.
Now your job.
No one could have been more excited to finally land their dream job, but wait a minute – this isn’t what you had aspired to! This isn’t even what you want to do. Now that’s a good question: What do you want to do. Hmm.
I mean, ever since you started watching those romantic comedies, you wanted to be in your mid-twenties (I certainly did)! It sounded like it was going to be the best time of you life, with so many opportunities, fancy clothes, exotic travelling and adventures. But what we all may have overlooked is the other side – of unemployment, job satisfaction issues, trouble in friendships and romantic relationships and struggles with new found independence.
But before you start panicking about the state of your life, take a deep breath.
You’re not alone.
What you’re going through is the formally termed- Quarter Life Crisis. And millions of people are right there on the boat, alongside of you.
This is What Quarter Life Crisis is...
The term “Quarter Life Crisis” is used to describe the anxieties, trials and tribulations of this time period. However, the life crisis does not have to occur literally a quarter way through and is mostly found to be hitting 20- and 30-somethings. More than the age, the term is used to describe the feelings of insecurity, restlessness, depression, anxiety, loneliness and uncertainty people between 25-35 tend to go through.
It Happens in Four Phases...
Recent studies by psychologists like Dr Robinson, Greenwood and The British Psychological Society have identified four to five specific phases by which, a quarter life crisis tends to manifest itself in.
- There is that feeling of being “locked in” or “trapped” in your job or relationship – or both. A feeling that you have been trapped in a life you don’t want.
- The next phase, unsurprisingly, is characterised by the need to escape. To look for methods of changing the current life and perhaps, most importantly, a realisation that change is conceivable and achievable.
- Phase three, is when you start to actually build you life vis a vis the earlier realisations. Now this may be taking a timeout, or something difficult and complicated like quitting that job which you at one point dreamed of, but now hate.
- And in the next and the last phase, you look at rebuilding with commitment.
This Can Actually be a Really Good Thing...
No, it’s not necessary that being young and confused you have to go through this. You may not, and you may. But the point is – if you do, that’s okay too.
According to research and studies, going through this quarter life crisis may, in fact, be a good thing. About 80 percent of people who reported having quarter life crisis, also reported that it was overall a positive thing for them.
Going through a life crisis in your twenties – says Dr Greenwood – may also help prevent a more severe mid life crisis later on in your life.
The thing is, worrying can be good! Tension, frustrations, anxieties can be good. It shows that you’re aware about yourself, your feelings as well as your environment. Paying attention to problems and realising that problems do exist, is much much better than the opposite. When you pay attention to not feeling right about life stuff, you have a higher chance of re-devising your life plans in order to feel like you’re on the correct path.
The important thing is to focus on the feelings you’re having, try to change your life and hold on through the ride!
(Prachi Jain is a psychologist, trainer, optimist, reader and lover of Red Velvets.)
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This is What Quarter Life Crisis is...
The term “Quarter Life Crisis” is used to describe the anxieties, trials and tribulations of this time period. However, the life crisis does not have to occur literally a quarter way through and is mostly found to be hitting 20- and 30-somethings. More than the age, the term is used to describe the feelings of insecurity, restlessness, depression, anxiety, loneliness and uncertainty people between 25-35 tend to go through.
It Happens in Four Phases...
Recent studies by psychologists like Dr Robinson, Greenwood and The British Psychological Society have identified four to five specific phases by which, a quarter life crisis tends to manifest itself in.
- There is that feeling of being “locked in” or “trapped” in your job or relationship – or both. A feeling that you have been trapped in a life you don’t want.
- The next phase, unsurprisingly, is characterised by the need to escape. To look for methods of changing the current life and perhaps, most importantly, a realisation that change is conceivable and achievable.
- Phase three, is when you start to actually build you life vis a vis the earlier realisations. Now this may be taking a timeout, or something difficult and complicated like quitting that job which you at one point dreamed of, but now hate.
- And in the next and the last phase, you look at rebuilding with commitment.
This Can Actually be a Really Good Thing...
No, it’s not necessary that being young and confused you have to go through this. You may not, and you may. But the point is – if you do, that’s okay too.
According to research and studies, going through this quarter life crisis may, in fact, be a good thing. About 80 percent of people who reported having quarter life crisis, also reported that it was overall a positive thing for them.
Going through a life crisis in your twenties – says Dr Greenwood – may also help prevent a more severe mid life crisis later on in your life.
The thing is, worrying can be good! Tension, frustrations, anxieties can be good. It shows that you’re aware about yourself, your feelings as well as your environment. Paying attention to problems and realising that problems do exist, is much much better than the opposite. When you pay attention to not feeling right about life stuff, you have a higher chance of re-devising your life plans in order to feel like you’re on the correct path.
The important thing is to focus on the feelings you’re having, try to change your life and hold on through the ride!
(Prachi Jain is a psychologist, trainer, optimist, reader and lover of Red Velvets.)
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