On a hot summer evening, not so long ago, I was at a friend’s place, drinking beer. The glass I was drinking was tall and made of thick glass. Everything about it seemed top quality.
As we were sitting on a mattress (he still didn’t have a bed), I teased him. “Fancy, eh... beer glass and all.. Where did you buy it from?”
“Oh, this... I stole it from a bar”
He then took me to the kitchen and exhibited five more glasses, proudly announcing the names of the bars he had nicked each from.“I got a whole set now”, he gleaned. We had a hearty laugh.
But when I saw the now-viral video of an Indian family caught stealing from a resort in Bali, it didn’t leave me amused. Unlike my friend’s transgression which had been presented to me as a funny anecdote, in this case, I was witness to all the characters of the scene. I could see the angered hotel staff, I could see the disgusting way in which the loot was hidden, inside suitcases and rolled-up towels.
I felt bewildered, on behalf of the hotel staff.
Why do people do it?
What is it that drives the well-to-do to temporarily let go off their inhibitions, and steal from hotels and bars?
Is it a childish kick, or opportunistic kleptomania? And what about the family that got caught — does their action make them thieves or opportunists?
Psychologist Kamna Chhibber rejects both labels. “They are a family which made absolutely the wrong moral judgment and got caught, ” she says.
But psychiatrist Madhumati Singh doesn’t rule out the possibility of the family’s behavior being a behavioral disorder, fueled by “the thrill of doing something wrong.”
Dr. Kamna cautions that the habit of nicking only escalates with time.
But are hotels really *that* unaware of what is being nicked from their guarded premises?
More often than not, they know, but are simply trained to look the other way. In fact, many hotels have a policy in place of what to ‘ignore’ and ‘what to highlight’.
But when confronted with an extreme case, as in the case of the Bali hotel, the hotel staff just has to intervene.
Despite the risks, there’s something about holidays that emboldens our risk taking abilities.
We get into behaviors not characteristic of us, simply because there’s the cloak of anonymity and we are metaphorically miles away from our own country.
“It does embolden us, the inhibitions go away,” says Nivedita. She adds that even tourist-y entitlement could be a reason for our brash behavior in another country.
Perhaps that’s why, the family thought it right to steal hangers, soap dispensers, and whatnot.
One thing is clear from the Bali incident though - that it is not that you aren’t able to afford those things yourself. It’s just that taking what’s not yours gives you a high.
But as with all other highs, this one too is temporary. The moment you are caught, it’s over. Then, the defence mechanism comes into play.
As the family members in the Bali incident were alternating between these stages to get them out of the mess, one of the family members offered to pay their way out of the transgression. But a hotel staff categorically rejected the offer. His words were, “It’s not about money, it’s about respect”.
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