ADVERTISEMENTREMOVE AD

QSatire: If Rajinikanth Was Bhuvan, How Would Lagaan End?

Ever wonder how DDLJ would end if Rajinikanth had been the hero?

Updated
Entertainment
3 min read
story-hero-img
i
Aa
Aa
Small
Aa
Medium
Aa
Large
Hindi Female

He is undoubtedly the demigod of Kollywood. An eminent personality, whose opening scene in a film is welcomed with hoots and applauses. He ends up looking younger than Ranbir Kapoor in most of his films, and has starred opposite actresses 37 years younger than him (remember Sonakshi Sinha and HIM in Lingaa). Yes, that’s Rajinikanth for you. The luminary star, who continues to shine despite his age.

Thalaivar is not allowed to die in his films because it might just cause a backlash in the state. This got us thinking at The Quint how some popular Bollywood films would end if they starred Rajinikanth in the lead.

ADVERTISEMENTREMOVE AD

Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge

Ever wonder how DDLJ would end if Rajinikanth had been the hero?
(Photo Illustration: Lijumol Joseph/ The Quint)

Ja Simran ja, jee le apni zindagi! Remember Amrish Puri’s iconic dialogue? Of course you do. You would also remember Kajol aka Simran’s long run to get to a particular coupe, where her Raj leaned out, extending his arms in welcome. So filmy!

If Thalaivar played Shah Rukh Khan’s character, he wouldn’t let Simran do all that running. He would stop the running train itself with his Herculean strength (something which Ethan Hunt couldn’t do. Mission Failed!). Rajini is a humble man, who can’t bare to see his ladylove drenched in sweat.

0

Lagaan

Ever wonder how DDLJ would end if Rajinikanth had been the hero?
(Photo Illustration: Lijumol Joseph/ The Quint)

The period film starring Aamir Khan proved to be a pivotal movie of his career, and a money-spinner at the Box Office. But apologies Mr Khan (please don’t cry), it took you three days to win a cricket match. Rajini Sir would have done it in a day (that too all by himself). Mind it!

Bhuvan and his teammates struggled under the sun, only to win the game in the last ball of the last over. Such drama!

Rajinikanth would have easily turned the three-day game into a T-20 match by hitting 6 sixes in 1 ball. Go figure!

ADVERTISEMENTREMOVE AD

Swades – We, The People

Ever wonder how DDLJ would end if Rajinikanth had been the hero?
(Photo Illustration: Lijumol Joseph/ The Quint)

In the film Shah Rukh Khan, a project manager at NASA, comes back to a small village in India and initiates social transformation by helping the village generate its own power. It invloved an arduous process – harnessing the power of a waterfall, buying turbines, and digging long trenches.

Ashutosh Gowariker, you should’ve just cast Rajini Da. We all know bio-gas is an effective energy source. The mighty wind he would have emitted from his posteriors would power an entire state for over a year.

Psst, Arvind Kejriwal, you know who to call when Delhi faces power-cuts!

ADVERTISEMENTREMOVE AD

Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara

Ever wonder how DDLJ would end if Rajinikanth had been the hero?
(Photo Illustration: Namita Handa Jolly/ The Quint)

Remember the bull-chase sequence from the hit road-trip drama film? And how our terrific trio ran for their lives?

If Rajini Sir was in the sequence, things would have been much different. First it would be him chasing the bulls, and not the other way around. And if God forbid any bull decided to come his way, it would fervently wish it was a cow. After all, Rajini ji would never harm the holy Indian cow.

Yanna rascala, mind it!

(At The Quint, we are answerable only to our audience. Play an active role in shaping our journalism by becoming a member. Because the truth is worth it.)

Read Latest News and Breaking News at The Quint, browse for more from entertainment

Topics:  Aamir Khan   Shah Rukh Khan   Rajinikanth 

Published: 
Speaking truth to power requires allies like you.
Become a Member
3 months
12 months
12 months
Check Member Benefits
Read More
×
×